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Wednesday, February 07, 2007 

Tears

I have been having tears in my dreams for the past few nights. I cant remember whether I did actually cry it out or just silently shedding tears.

Even my pillow is wet.

I don't know the reason, I don't understand the cause, and I certainly don't recall those dreams.

I just cried.

I remember when I was young I wrote something like this: Darkness is not something should be feared. It's there since the begining of time, side by side with light. It's human that's afraid of darkness. And to counter that, they start creating unnecessary lights, or brightness......"

I was,at that time, very much into human psychology, subconsious, and the new age thinking.

As for my tears now, the moment I started to question my mental health, I stopped myself. Perhaps it's better leaving a part of myself unseen, being absolutely hidden in darkness.

You may say I'm being selfish for if I'd lost my mind, I would be a big burden to my love ones. I don't know how to answer that but whatever it will be, it will not be long before we all meet again in heaven. We human can't live that long.

We all are going to die someday and things before that doesn't seem to be much of a big deal. Just enjoy our fare share of laughters and cryings.

Maybe I really should have a child.

P/S: Just got my daily lyrics quote: " In my life, I don't mean much to anyone - James Morrison". Damn I almost cry again. Think I'm gonna test the CD soon,



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