Bonnie & Clyde

Last Saturday we lined up for 30 mins at Times Square cinema to get to the ticket booth, not because there was a lot of people. Well, the people were there, but that wasn’t the reason. People were practically having a tele conference, such as this ambitious couple ahead of us (I would love to upload their pic but photobucket is acting up).

Such poise, such style, such eloquent debate on which movie to watch, what time to watch, who is in the movie, what is the storyline, is there any nudity or swearing in it, who is wearing what and etc. It took them dimwits 15 minutes to walk away with 2 tickets.

When our turn fianlly came, we asked if there was still tickets for Shrek 3 at 430pm. Only front row seats left? No thanks. That was that. I actually timed us and we walked away after 30 seconds.

It wasn’t exactly rocket science. D-uh.

"Why girls always stick to those Ang Moh?" On the phone, my friend sounded so bored. I can hear there're people laughing and talking in the background. He should be in a pub or something.

"Er, blame your parents, dude. "

"Hey face is not everthing ok, I have my charm too."

"I m not talking about your face, I am talking about your skin."

Later we met, as most Malaysians, in a mamak. He said he just gotta escape outta there, a casual after-work gathering with colleagues, and some overseas expat whom're here to study their plant.

I can see it's not the boredom that chased him out, he is, obviously, very low self esteem.

" It started out pretty well for almost an hour, we, three guys and five girls, were just having dinner, a little drink and a lot of fun, cracking jokes and such. But once the Guai Lou were here, it just seemed like all the girls were all over them. Nobody admired our charm, laughed to our jokes, or just acknowlege our existence."

"Actually the Guai Lou did laugh to our jokes, I think they're fine. Polite gentlemen. Just the girls, they only laugh when the Guai Lou laughed; as if they're seeking their approval."

And I told him to go Bangkok.

He called today, still in Bangkok, telling me and insisting that those girls are not prostitude,

This's how it inspired me to write this post.

Guys in Malaysia, many of us, always ask stupid questions like why asian girls always fall for caucasians. Why do their eyes shine brighter? Why they smile wider? Why they laugh louder? As a human being, I would say not ALL Asian girls are like that. and As a "yellow skin", I would say it's because of the inferiority of their own race that cause them act so.

That's the exact reason I told this friend of mine to go Bangkok, or India or some other places I suggested.

I have no intention of saying ALL Thai girls or girls from countries I suggested have this feeling of inferiority of their own race. No I dont mean that. I m just telling from what I experienced and from stories I heard; about Chinese, who can also speak fluent English, experience.

You might agree with it I dont expect you to, just like I wont agree with somebody if he said Chinese girls have this inferior feelings towards themselves and therefore they always hook on to caucasians.

I am just telling you, you can give it a try if you want to. However, if you dont, it does no harm to your life either.

So come back to the question why Malaysian man do so much complaints about Malaysian girls hanging onto Caucasian man; actually I think the men know the answer. It's just we refuse to face it.

Our Yang Berhormat have been appearing in the press recently. Maybe I should rephrase that, they are ALWAYS there, just that this time, instead of arguing over national related issues with their opposition parties' members, they're now fighting against "civilian", the likes of you and I.

RM0.40 for a glass of water/ais kosong/air suam. Too expensive? RM1.80 per Milo ais a rip off?

Let's not say which side I m with, the mamak or the yang berhormat; let's look at the reason behind all this fuss made.

Really, RM0.40 for a glass a water is really too expensive? Or RM1.50 for a glass of Kopi-ais unreasonable? To me, the poor mamak actually did put up a signboard listing all the prices clearly for consumer as reference before they order. So what the f**k? If listing or layout the prices to customer before they order is not going to save you from the trouble of being accused "tak jujur", our beloved minister, let us go starb*ck, Ik*a Cafe, or even Conc*rd Hotel; you will have a lot more to complain.

Of course if we start war with those international group of companies, we will even lose more foreign investment, even more foreign money is afraid to be invested in Malaysia. That's a bad thing. So does it make it right, hence, to open fire to these humble smaller companies? Especially these are 100% Malaysian owned companies?

Probably he'll say, "After the operase, whould go xxxxx for a glass of chilling iceblended coffee. They r having promotion now, only RM9.xx. Not even 10 bucks...."

I remember a story read when I was young. A farmer was once lost in the jungle for days, he was hungry, thirsty, and exhausted. He prayed to the Moutain God for guidence and finally he managed to get back. He was so happy and, as he promised if he got saved, he prepared lots of food and gave it back to the creatures of the forest. He prepared wheat, barley, and corn; each pile up as tall as a man at the edge of the forest. In no time, animals started to come and eat the food he prepared; deer, buffalo, birds etc. Until suddenly he found that there were some tiny creatures munching on those food. He look down and saw that they were rats, not hamster, rats.
He got so angry and started to chase those rats away. The rats said, "but we're also cretures from the mountain!" And the farmer replied, "......."

What the farmer said is the moral of the story which is, not exactly what I feel today.

Since our Prime Minister announced the increment for civil servant a month ago, many people have been very cautious about us, the civilian, the buyers, being over-spent, and the sellers being over-charged. We can read from the paper now there operations going into the public to make sure nobody increase the selling prices of their goods. To protect "us", the general public.

I am not saying this's not good nor wrong. I am a believer of free-market, or capitalism. Supply and demand market flow. There's a good intention for our government to do that. The only question is: is there a good intention?

Trying to control a Nes-Lo ais below RM1.50 while can allow RM10 plus ice-blended drink with a similar substance. Good intention it might be.

Control the prices of the eggs, the flour, the can food, the vege, the chicken, all those hawkers and shops are selling; but hush hush on the increment of our petrol, our toll.

I somehow heard somebody's saying, "these are for deers and rebits and the likes of the lovable animals. You disgusting rats, go away!"

I hate it when something / someone disturbs my slumber. Be it Clyde, my mom, her dog, the maid, the neighbourhood maids or noisy birds chirping outside my room. I remember yelling ”OOOI!!! DIAM LAH! TAK PAYAH TIDO KE?!” from my room window at mom’s house in USJ at a Deepavali-Bollywood sesh at 3am. I also yelled ”HELLO! TAK BLEH DUDUK DIAM-DIAM KE?!!” at a little girl who couldn’t quit stomping up and down at a cinema.

What irks me most is when the maid knocks on my door unrelentlessly for something trivial. Oh, I value my sleep too much to be signing the delivery form for the postman. She does this all the time, for the postman, for the plumber, for someone who is looking for FIL who is obviously not home, etc.

I worked till 430am yesterday and slept at 6am this morning. Come 11am, there was a knock on my bedroom door. I ignored it but the knocks continued. Finally, it stopped but it came back after 30 mins. Of course it’s Ana the maid asking me to sign something for the postman. Later, I had a word with her:

“Lu dengar baik-baik ah. Kalau saya kat rumah hanya bermakna:
1) Saya sakit
2) Saya kerja lambat

Oleh itu saya mau tido. Jangan kacau saya kecuali ada rompak, api atau orang mati.”

Of course, I didn’t meant it word-for-word, but this is just to give her an idea of how a sleep-deprived Bonnie reacts to the world. Otherwise, Bonnie is a sweet gal. Really.

My first upload for a local modeller forum.

Years ago.

When I was in the States. When BBS is the most active place people went into in cyberspace. When I was still preferd to use Unix to browse the net. When in universities, professor were still lecturing and explaining what is "internet".

I got hooked. To this thing called irc.

Ok lets talk modern; many out there dont even know what the hell I m talking about. It's like icq, messanger etc. A program which you use to live-chat with others.

The screen was blue then, with reverse white words to indicate what you'd typed as well as others. If you looked at it for 10 minutes, you'll feel nothing. As for me, when I started to see all things in reality as pink, I knew I was in trouble.

People wearing pink shirts. Ambulance was pink. Elevator button were all pink.

I went to see a therapist, is paid for by foreign student insurance, and she told me that I had nothing wrong with my eyes. It's my near to addiction in the cyberspace.

I listened to her. I am clean for more than ten years (Please clap).

Since then, though I didnt quit computer gaming, but I was always very cautious of the internet. I just browse the net for information. Didnt have an account for web mail, messanger or any sort, no friend making stuff. The furthest I went is having this blog and occasionally join some forums.

After more than ten years of self discipline, with some self testing, I think I m just strong enuf to deal with the internet again. I reactivate friendster, register myself instead of going in as a guest in some forums.

I've been doing this for more than a week, and to my surprise, I find that I m not that interested in the internet. It didnt thrill me that much. I m just so happy with it.

Of course I m still doing it with reserve which I think is a good thing. I do not keep anonymous. For all things I registered online, I m using my real name, which I think will keep me aware of reality and not be lost in the cyberspace again.

I think this is a new start, and a good one.

Finally I have a handphone with a decent camera. 2 Megapixel. No big deal to many, but compared to my previous VGA camera, this is like changing from a bicycle to a Ferrari.

Damm, I got a new phone and all I can talk about is the camera? Feel like I m one of those dumb stud who keep chasing the latest tech gadgets for the sake of just doing it.

Er.. what else I can share about my phone?

Yeah, it's silver color

http://www.yahoobreakingnews.com

I think yahoo will sue this fella soon.

But it will definitely scare the shit outta somebody, especially those would get hysteric very fast.

Of course it would have no effect on people who have no sense of what kind of effect it'll bring if it did really happen.

I met both types.

Sometimes I wish there's one machine that you can just push one button and viola! tens of thousands of products just appeared in no time. Job done! Everybody so happy and they sing and dance and enjoy themselves for the rest of the day.

Yeah, I m a manufacturer. This, I believe will happen, only be in my dream.

My client believe the same thing.

Just that they thought it's a reality.

After reading Bonnie's post "The Haves and Have Nots", there's a lot of feelings flowing in me. I have done some pondering, well the following is not exactly based on Bonnie's defination, but my own opinion on people who always complain about life not treating them well.

Lets start with myself.

I m from a quite well off family. With healthy and good childhood. I have never have to worry about getting my stomach filled. Always being showered with loves and cares. Have good friends that could share with. Resources that is more than necessity. Luxury from time to time.I have a good wife. I gotta travel. I have a healthy body. I m the boss for hundred over people. I have hobbies.

So, am I considered lucky?

Before I answer that, lets see the other sides of me. I had very stressful childhood, and academic ranking below 3 in the class will get myself with quite some scolding and spanking. I ad one hour each day for relaxation; half for tv and half for play. I had friends that betrayed for something toally unnecessary. I have a deformed chest, always the laughing stock during my schoold days. I had a father with serious depression and two suicide attempts. I have an obligation to take over my family business since young, my university courses are consolations for giving up my dreams.

So, am I considered unlucky?

I think it's all in our perspective of viewing oursleves. As for me, bad things happen. They will, always. But bad things will just come and go. Good things will always stay; they will become part of me.

So if anyone should think I am in the groups of "Haves", lemme tell you, there're things that you have which I don't. It's all in our minds; if you categorise yourself in that group, then you are one of them.

Some may say of course you r in the haves group, at least financially, what's there to consider as have-not when you have a plant generates 30 mil per year? Well put it this way, if you r fired by your boss today, what you have remain, financially? your bank account with RM20,000 balance? or the worst case, zero in balance?

If my company failed today, my bank account will have a balance of negative twelve million; for if I find a job of RM10,000 per month and give all my salary to pay the due, it would take me like 100years. Consider you are lucky when you do not have to pay when you got out of your current job.

We always forgot or take things for granted. The best car in the world has no comparison to our foot. The best movie in the world has no match to our imagination. The best food in the world is no use if we dont have our tongue. Not only our body, things that are given to us free of charge everyday, every second? Water, air, the forest, the ocean, the moon etc etc. Have we ever paid for any of this on top of the question, can we live without any of this?

Still, can we call ourselves the Have-Nots? If not, when we consider ourselves in the Haves group, can we not call ourselves lucky?

Only two types of people are not. First, those who lost their mind. Second, those who've forgotten they are.

So, am I still considered lucky?

I am. Sure I am. And I know it since the day I am born.

I’ve been infected by HK and Iuven with the latest Prison Break craze.

It’s fan-ta-bu-lous.

Every episode gets me going for “One more episode only. Just another 45 minutes.”

I’m hooked.

My vocabulary also expanded. I learnt prison slang like “lockdown”, “shakedown”, “route 66”, “fish”, “SHU”, “snowflake”, etc. You know or not? Ask me, ask me.

Can’t wait for season 3. :P

The world is divided into distinct halves - the haves and the have-nots.

I came into the world with average education, limited skills and moderate intelligence. My parents had trouble coughing up moolah for secondary text books and school fees. It became worse when I attended a non-profitable institution for a Diploma which cost RM790 per semester twice a year for 3 years. I thought that was dirt cheap but what did I know? I was just a stupid kid.

So what’s a girl gotta do to make an honest living to support an elderly mother and aunt and buy a Kancil? I have no rich parents to tide me over when things get tough. I’m all old skool discipline and training and I believe the most honourable way to the top is to work your way up, taste the blood, sweat and tears. Therefore, that makes me a ‘have-not’.

And then there are ‘the haves’, those who were born with 999K gold bars shoved down their abalone-and-lobster filled tummies. These are the ones who always complain about how the world stereotyped them for being loaded, how they never asked for it, can we please understand the stress they are going through and they depended on themselves all their lives, so said the one who went to the best colleges around, those who’s already a working adult but is still using papa’s gold card to buy LV bags, the one who believes charm can get them through life, not hard work. Charms and looks, among ‘other’ things. These are the ones who have it easy and never had to work very hard for anything coz everything is handed by them on a diamond studded platinum platter.

But to be fair, not all are like that. Some invest with their inherited capital and expertise to become the nouvo rich. Then I look at people (like Clyde, for instance) who isn’t born with a silver spoon but is relatively well-off. He makes an effort to get to work early (but not always hehe) and work hard (again, not always haha) but I don’t think he went through what I did lor. Being a boss, Clyde has his own set of headaches and nightmares but mine are different. Mine are in the category of paranoia, i.e. what does my bosses / colleagues / client / suppliers think of me / my work, will I get promoted / fired / increment / bonus / back stabbed, etc. That’s the psyche of an average employee, a small fry.

And what do I make out of all this? Nothing. Just that I know I am street smart-er and will survive the bigger bumps in life, should there be anymore.

*smug grin*

Gosh, we have been frequenting Jogoya @ Star Hill so much it’s not funny anymore. 3x in 3 months is no joke. See how we used to love it? Standards have dropped immensely since the last time we patronised the place.

For starters, they don’t serve the hairy crab in the sashimi section anymore. It’s only for the VIP card members now. :'(

Secondly, there was no smile from the serving waitresses. Even the girl who was serving at the dessert parlour sulked and did not return my smile or thanks. Same goes to the guy who was manning the chinese soups and dim sum corner. We weren’t supposed to pick the dim sum by hand, but nobody served us so we ended up doing it on our own.

We sat at table no. 62 and the waitresses kept bringing us food for table no. 92. Because there was 7 of us, we didn’t know who ordered what and ended up eating everything. When we told the waitress to return back another prawn dish for 92, she took the dish threw the food down the garbage pail without a word. She could have sent it to the correct table but since it’s a buffet, there is no cost incurred and 92 is not her responsibility, she just threw food away like it’s going out of style. We were shocked to silence.

What bugs me most is the way the waitresses hurried our meal by removing our plates hastily. There was no enquiry whether we have finished our food and could they please clear the plates. Again, there was no smile or apology for each mistake. This is a far cry from the sashimi section, where there was an abundant of smiles and food clarifications.

I understand most of the staffs are foreign workers but it won’t hurt the management to teach them some basic English, dining etiquette and force some common sense into their thick skulls.

I tell ya, Clyde is one lucky bugger coz Bonnie have got a helluva body.

From the front angle, you can see an hour glass figure. From the side, oso got hour glass figure. This is the result of too many buffet outings. :D

I said my prayer and flipped the coin. Heads, I stay. Tails, I go. But before the coin stopped spinning, I knew where my heart was. It went like, “Not the tail, please don’t show me the tail.”

So that’s how I decided. In the end, I didn’t even look at which side the coin showed.

Boleh pakai jugak. :)

I am stupid. At least from tme to time, I try very hard to be.

Especially when it is about decision making.

And, especially, especially tough decision making.

I am not good at making choices. I am better in dealing with consequences, either they are good or bad ones.

So, I will always keep things extremely simple, as simple as I could, when there is a dilema about to be faced. I mean tough choices. To me, once the decision is made, dilema isnt going to happen.

I know not everybody agree to what I believe.

Now Bonnie is facing a very important decision she gotta make, which will affect our lives quite a bit. Her decision, in the end, actually doesnt affect me that much. I am not being cold blooded here. In fact, I am putting more effort into preparing myself to live through the result together with her.

If it would cause tears, let us cry together. If it resulted hardship, let us work harder together. Of course, if it trigger laughter, let us smile together.

On the day we were married, I was told/taught I am, as the man of the house, to be the decision maker; it's God's way of designing a family. However, I always let Bonnie make her choices. Maybe it's being selfish that it seems she is the one be responsible; maybe it's an act God isn't so happy about; I believe I am more suitable of being the supportive role.

Whatever choices she's made, that's my responsibility; no doubt about it. Just like Adam got scolding from God first, when Eve took the fruit. However, I believe since God's made me with such characteristic of being a suportive nature, He has His plan.

So Bonnie, I wish you should just calm down. Any decision you make you will have my full support. Just please dont get too caught up with it. It's not worth to sacrifice your beauty sleep :-)

大不了我养您!

It’s a forked road actually, but I thought the former will make a more interesting title. Hehe.

Both leads to uncertainties and are equally questionable. The endings are very loose and open-ended. I definitely do not know which is the right or better choice. I really don’t. I thought I did, but I was told I’m wrong. I’ve got mixed feedback and reactions simultanenously.

So torn, so confused, so lost.

I think I will say a prayer and flip a coin tonight.

How was your flight to Nice? I’m sorry I couldn’t make it for lunch. I tendered my resignation the day you flew off. As you can imagine, emotions were in turmoil, work was disarrayed but tempers were in check. After procrastinating for weeks, the decision was made. It’s heartbreaking to leave a place and the people you spent half a decade with. I wanted to say I will be leaving part of my heart behind, but I prefer keeping it and bringing the good times with me.

Chris left for Avene the day after you did and her husband to Paris the day after.

Seems like everyone’s leaving me for France! What does that country has that I don’t huh? Flenj Fly in Flanj? LOL

I didn’t wanna burden you with these thoughts as you were busy saying your goodbyes and entertaining farewell parties. I should be in a whole new environment by the time you complete your studies. See you in October and take care babe.

All my love,
Bonnie

I have always like stuff that carry a bit of its dark side. Not really the all-out hardcore gory stuff, but stuff that is just a little twisted from the norm.

Bonnie knows that.

This year, she is kind and sensitive enough to get me my birthday present the way I really wanted, and even to some extent out of my expectation.

She got me books by Neil Gaiman.

Not many, I had tried some short stories from this writer. Not to say I dislike it, despite very entertaining, I found that somehow it always leave a hole inside me after reading. It's like seeing something extremely promising and the final didnt come up to expectation.

I'm not talking about his writing; he's a damn good writer and I'm in no position to criticise. I'm talking about his stories.

As comparison, Tim Burton, my all time favourite director, loves to use children-friendly images and stories (at least in the surface) to convey messages and feelings that's truly cruel and dark. I love that; because after the shows/storiesthey'll leave feelings in your heart, question marks in your mind. Whatever it is, there's no rest.

Neil Gaiman is the opposite. His stuff usually started with freakish atmosphere, haunting mysteries, and scary tones. It's almost always full of uncertainties and will always trigger the inner fear in me. However, when the story unfolds, Gaiman will give the reader more light/hope. The ending will usually be bringing some positive messages.

I am always seeking for a darker post-reading feeling; hence Burton's surface-sunny background-shadow suits me better; as compared to Gaiman's dark tone of story-telling, which makes me expect something even darker in the end but actually the total opposite.

I was, always, expecting the wrong thing and therefore it explains my emptiness after reading his stuff.

One of the books Bonnie bought me is called "Anansi Boys" which is, as the early paragraph stated, out of my expectation. This book, starting from the very begining, is a very funny story. Funny as in it really trigger laughter. Though throughout to the middle it does carry bits and pieces of the normal Gaiman dark tone, the whole story is just plain full of nicely written jokes.

I was actually laughing when I read it. Of course the neding will be the normal Gaiman's stuff which is pretty much a happy ending but it doesnt bother me. It's because from the very begining, it has never attempt to be dark at all.

I must say this is probably the best reading I had since 2006. It's a fantastic book!

And it's a fantastic birthday gift!