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Thursday, April 19, 2007 


Some time ago I was chatting with this group of friend of mine, which happen to consist quite some "weird" people. We went all sorts of topics; from political and social issues, to philosophy stuff. Finally, we talked about sex.

Amongst them there're a few who have totally abnormal sexual preference, eg voyuerism, transvetite etc. I shared my experience and feelings about silk and satin. All broke into laughter. Maybe it's not usual to them, but I was crowned the "satin fetishist". I really don't know whether I am one or not, but being grouped together with "peeping tom" or "batang lover" makes me feel uneasy.

Am I, as they say, consider one of the unsual sexual preference people?

Lets rationalise the whole thing.

Since young I have this special love on this kinda fabric. Something smooth and shiny. Need not to be shiny, but smooth is the point.

Silk and satin, they are. Or even velvet if you stroke it in the right direction.

Of course this unusual good feeling is sometimes sexual. Whenever Bonnie's in satin, I got excited pretty easily. However, it's not entirely sexual.

I remember when I was in high school, sometimes a whole gang of us will visit one of the gang member house while we all chucked into his tiny bedroom, mostly watching videos (Dont ask me what type) or smoking or drinking or just took a nap.

This fella has this bed sheet made of satin. We used to laugh at it as it looked like some props for Playboy video. However, deep inside, I like his bed very much. Everytime I went there, I would be the first one to jump on his bed, most rpobably would fall asleep.

It's nothing sexual, I was just enjoying the smoothness of the fabric touching my face, my hand, and any part of my skin. I could just relax so fast and fell asleep before I knew it.

Is this fetish? According to the dictionary, it's, first related to sexual feelings and activities; second, unusual and unreasonable.

- Sexual feeling:
Well, I cant deny during sexual moment there're extra points given is these kind of fabric exist (So yes, I am a fetishist)
But if there wasnt a sexual moment, the fabric, though might help, but will not create such sexual urge. (So not, I am not a fetishist)

- Unusual:
I don't think any of my action or reaction towards these fabrics is unusual. I love to touch them but I dont do any other things to them; like putting into my mouth or something. (No, I'm not that crazy!)

- Unreasnable:
Is being smooth and nice to touch a reason? It might be. But there're thousands of other things that are also smooth but I dont have that same love like I do with the fabric. Just silk and satin only, it's unreasonable. (Sigh, yes, I am a fetishist)

Is there something call a weekend fetish? If there was, probably I'll fall into that category.

But I dont want to be in the same category as peeping tom and batang holder.

Help me Bonnie.

If only you'd let me peep.


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